As 2013 comes to an end, I thought it would be nice to reflect on the last 365 days of life. There were ups and downs, goods and bads, happiness and sadness.. but overall, it was a year that taught me a lot not only about myself, but about life and many others.
January brought us basketball, appointments, and tons of testing. Matt's basketball team was incredibly successful in January. So successful that they made county and district playoffs and we had to postpone our Las Vegas trip! We had our first appointment with our RE, Dr. Bromer. He explained our various options and ordered tests on tests on tests for both of us. We would spend the rest of this month scheduling these tests and even completing some of them.
February brought us some discouraging news, but also brought us Rooney. This was the month we learned that IVF would be our only option to conceive a biological child of our own. While we were pretty upset about this news, we got ourselves into battle mode. We decided to fight this battle and move forward with our first IVF cycle. This month we added another furry child to our family. Rooney, a yellow lab, came home in the middle of the month and has fit in perfectly. He is our bundle of energy and Sophie's best friend!
March brought the beginning of our first IVF cycle, the stomach flu, and the start of lacrosse season. This month included daily birth control pills, a mock transfer, injection courses, and the start of this blog. We remained positive throughout this month and looked forward to what the future had in store. Lacrosse season began with a series of wins followed by one disappointing loss. Nevertheless, the girls fought on.
April brought the heart of our first IVF cycle. We did daily injections - 3 or 4 a day depending on the day. We had our egg retrieval and we had our first embryo transfer. Despite my OHSS, we transferred one embryo five days past our egg retrieval. We had high hopes for this cycle.
May brought a glimmer of happiness along with deep sadness, a second round of the stomach flu, and lacrosse playoffs. On May 10th, we learned that our first cycle had been a success. We were pregnant and cautiously happy. A few hours later, we learned that my Grandma lost her short battle with pancreatic cancer. I have so much of her personality in me. This was one of the hardest losses I ever had to deal with. We said goodbye with beautiful services, but still miss her dearly. My lacrosse team made county and district playoffs this month and won our division. We came in 3rd in our county and won our first district game in the history of the program. We came within one goal of make it to state playoffs. Disappointing, but quite a feat.
June brought another bout of sadness, surgery, and a much needed vacation. We had our third ultrasound with Dr. Bromer. This ultrasound would cease to show us a heartbeat and begin the miscarriage process. My body could not do this on it's own, so a D&C was scheduled for the following day. We would later learn that our baby girl suffered from Trisomy 15 and would have been a stillborn if she would have survived past the first trimester. Following all of this sadness, we took our annual much needed vacation to the Outer Banks with my family. This vacation provided the sun, sand, relaxation and family time that we desperately needed. We were also able to celebrate our first anniversary with dinner at the same place we got married. Thank you, Beachside Bistro.
July brought the start of our second round of IVF, or first frozen cycle. This month consisted of another round of birth control pills and the start of my first intramuscular injections. We were also able to celebrate July 4th with family.
August brought our second embryo transfer and the start of a new school year. On August 15th, we transferred two embryos. On August 30th, we learned that the cycle had failed and neither embryo stuck. Again, we were crushed, but decided to push forward.
September brought the start of our third IVF cycle, or second frozen cycle. We would decide to keep this one a secret. We began with a third round of birth control pills and a second round of intramuscular injections. This time we would add in prednisone pills and Lovenox (blood thinner) injections. Our new protocol brought us hope.
October would bring our third embryo transfer. On October 10th, we transferred another two perfect embryos. The two week wait was the worst during this round. I have found the more you know, the more difficult things become. I want to be ignorant again. October 23rd brought us our second BFP. We were so afraid to be excited this time around. Again, we kept it a secret to everyone but immediate family and a select few close friends.
November would bring us three successful ultrasounds and a graduation day from our clinic along with Thanksgiving dinner at our house. Wow. Our baby was growing and had a strong heartbeat. Dr. Bromer decided we were ready to graduate. We had our first appointment with our new OB. Still hard to believe that this was really happening. We hosted Thanksgiving at our house this year and were able to spend a nice couple of days with family, followed by another full day of shopping on Black Friday.
December would bring our pregnancy announcement and our best Christmas to date. While we were missing those who were no longer with us, this Christmas was beyond special. We hit our second trimester and finally felt comfortable announcing our pregnancy to the world! We are so grateful to have made it this far.
This year has taught me so many things. I have learned that I will never be one of those "drunken cheerleaders" that gets pregnant under the bleachers. I have learned that we will always (ok, like 3% chance naturally) need medical interventions to get pregnant. I have learned that everything happens for a reason and that God has a plan for all of us. I have made some very special friends. Friends that I will have for a lifetime, even if we never have the opportunity to meet in person. Friends that I would never have if we had not had to travel down this path of infertility. Friends that I can text at any time of the day or night and know they have my back. I have learned that we have an incredibly amazing support group. I have learned that I have more strength and courage than I ever thought imaginable. I have learned that family is everything. I have learned to cherish every little thing and person in life, though I have also learned that not everyone is meant to stay in your life for the long haul. I have learned to appreciate every battle that life deals you and to face them head on. I have learned to learn from these battles and not hide my face in fear. I have learned that every injection received, every ache and pain felt, every penny spent, and every tear shed is worth it in the end.
Tonight we will wrap up 2013 at a small gathering with friends. Overall I am thankful for all that 2013 has brought us. We would not have the knowledge we do today and I am confident that our marriage would not be as strong as it is as a result of these trials and tribulations. I would not have the friendships that I treasure so much. And we would not be expecting the baby that we are. I am beyond blessed and grateful for all of this.
Thank you all for the parts you have played in our lives this year. Cheers to 2014. May it be your best yet! Remember, "Tomorrow is the first blank page of a 365 page book. Write a good one."
I know I am looking forward to all 2014 to bring! Happy New Year to each and every one of you.
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